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Old 12-27-2015, 08:04 AM
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Renee M Renee M is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Carl & Deb View Post
Horsefeathers, in reference to your quote : “I don’t think we get smarter as we get older. I just think we run out of stupid things to do…” I think you must be a little behind the curve. I'm 67 and I still haven't run out of stupid things to do. Ask my wife.
That was funny!
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Even so, Come Lord Jesus,
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Luke 21:36 "Watch ye therefore, and pray always, that ye may be accounted worthy to escape all these things that shall come to pass, and to stand before the Son of man."

We will either dwell in the secret place of the Most High or our flesh will make us want to hide things in secret. -- Nathan Leal
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Old 12-27-2015, 08:22 AM
Horsefeathers Horsefeathers is offline
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A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, “What are the grounds for your divorce?” She replied, “About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by.”

“No,” he said, “I mean what is the foundation of this case? “It is made of concrete, brick and mortar,” she responded.

“I mean,” he continued, “What are your relations like?’ “I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband’s parents.”

The judge said, “Do you have a real grudge?” “No,” she replied, “We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one.”

“Please,” he tried again, “is there any infidelity in your marriage?’ “Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don’t necessarily like the music, but the answer to your question is yes.”

“Ma’am, does your husband ever beat you up?” “Yes,” she responded, “about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do.”

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, “Lady, why do you want a divorce?” “Oh, I don’t want a divorce,” she replied. “I’ve never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he can’t communicate with me.”
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Old 12-27-2015, 10:04 AM
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Renee M Renee M is offline
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I heard one from a preacher on TV. The short version is this:

Four guys were discussing when life truly begins. (Conception, sometime during the pregnancy stage, at birth)

One guy listened for a bit and told them they were ALL wrong. "Life begins when your last child leaves the house to begin life on their own."
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Even so, Come Lord Jesus,
Renee M


Luke 21:36 "Watch ye therefore, and pray always, that ye may be accounted worthy to escape all these things that shall come to pass, and to stand before the Son of man."

We will either dwell in the secret place of the Most High or our flesh will make us want to hide things in secret. -- Nathan Leal
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